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 Post subject: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-12 11:30 pm 
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Joined: 2007-Jan-05 12:58 am
Age: Elder Dragon
I am committing these notes to paper for fear that I will never have the opportunity to relay what I have seen to another caring soul. Or, if I do manage to escape alive, I may have been rendered too incompetent to reliably describe these events by that time. I can already feel my sanity slipping from me. The thought that these pages might be found by the outside world in time is doubtlessly futile, but it provides me hope.

It seems that my dear wife was correct all along; my ambitions have led me to my peril. During my investigation, I have been captured by Nebuchadnezzar's mad cult. The only solace I can take is in the fact that my suspicions were correct, and they plan to break the Great Old Ones' slumber. Although the individuals of this sect are more or less insignificant, other than Nebuchadnezzar himself, I will provide a physical description of each in the hope that they may somehow be brought to justice for what they've done to me:
It is clear that many of them have become something other than human, if they were ever human at all.

The cultists don't seem to regard me as a threat in any manner. I am free to wander the Halls of Mist as I please, at least as much as my condition allows. This notebook is no secret, and they even know of what I write inside. The Gatekeeper even supplied me with a list of their “assets” upon request! The cult is powerful, and have managed to acquire a robust collection of artifacts which is housed deep below the Halls, in a bottomless vault.

Attached to this page of the notebook is a yellowed leathery sheet. The sheet is covered with queer red calligraphy:

Their prized possessions, though, not listed there, are the Phyrexian Portal and Naked Singularity situated at the back of the Halls, in the great arcade. The cult believes that these two objects, combined in some way, will awaken the Old Ones. I have taken the time to peruse the folio and arcane book and have concluded that they are pieces of the fabled Necronomicon. I pray that they are yet too incomplete to enact the cult's plan.

Within the pages, though, are many complete recipes for arcane rituals. Scholars of the dark arts might recognize the demonic agreements Promise of Power and Tainted Pact, or the ghastly Polymorph and, worse, Hecatomb. The group includes me, forces me to participate, in many of their ceremonies, now. After my Snake Cult initiation, horrible procedures have occurred almost daily. At least, I think so. Time has been difficult to measure for... some time.

During these rites, my mind travels outside of me, flitting through the blind eternities, filled with underworld dreams. I see visions, familiar as childhood horrors, unreal as aetherplasm drifting past alien planets. There are flashes of violence. A faceless butcher slaying a child. Unidentifiable squirming masses smothering an alien race. The light of distant stars refracting through an enormous mist dragon. Meaningless flashes of colour, sound and intense emotion. Memories from other beings, other times. When I return to my physical body, I find myself exhausted and anemic. It's impossible to recall the time elapsed, or the events that unfolded.

I'm sure that the cult's meddling with the fabrics of space and time have caused punctures and tears. The horrors of my dreams are coming into being. Necrotic ooze covers the floors and walls of the Halls of Mist, completely now! The cultists now appear as an unstoppable netherborn phalanx. Horror of horrors!, where there was once an inert portal at the end of the arcade leers a terrible void Maw, ready to swallow the Earth!

My health is quickly failing. I am wracked hourly with fits of painful coughing, expelling substances I know that my body could not produce. I would sleep continually if not for uncontrollable seizures that break my dreamless slumber.

beyond any shadow of Doubt, I am on the brink of Madness; on a gibbering descent into It. Mind twist. My shred memory... i can t evin recal the fais of my wife... did wee hav a familee?? mind SHAtTered/ brainsPoILed - - Ia!

The writing becomes illegible. The next many pages are filled with unsettling depictions of unthinkable creatures.
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Kozilek Ugin wgah'nagl fhtan.
Ia! Ia!
Lorthos fhtagn Ulamog Ugin fhtagn!




My health has returned. I feel strong and vital as ever in my life. Nebuchadnezzar's cult seems to have forgotten about me, also. They stand in the Halls of Mist (which are completely clean, again) day and night, chanting the names of their dieties: Wrexial, the Risen Deep, Kozilek, Butcher of Truth, the nameless Cosmic Horror, Lorthos, the Tidemaker, It That Betrays, Hypnox, and Ulamog, the Infinite Gyre. Day and night here, actually, is somewhat meaningless, as the sun never moves behind the curtains of swirling mists. I suppose, after all that has happened, it is not too difficult to believe that we are on Teferi's Isle, from the children's tales. Traveling on a magical island outside of time would explain my lack of need for food or rest. I have been exploring my home for perhaps months now. This place was once inhabited, but now it is only them and I. It's impossible to determine my location on Earth, so I have decided to draw a map. The island is large, and it's difficult to hold a pen in my claws, but I have nothing if not time. Perhaps someone who sees this will know this place.

It is time to rid myself of this notebook. I'll cast it to the currents of the ocean, and hope that someone finds it with the power to help. I would pray for this, but I do not know what to pray to. My dear wife Mary, I love you. I wish that we do not live long enough to witness the coming storm.

Yours,


Last edited by Ban Ki-moon on 2011-Jan-13 12:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-12 11:43 pm 
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Joined: 2010-Sep-11 12:19 pm
Age: Elder Dragon
naked singularity?

.. to many colors?

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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-12 11:44 pm 
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Joined: 2010-Aug-06 1:54 am
Age: Elder Dragon
Location: USA
Although I cannot say that this is the best decklist I've ever seen, it is bar none the best presentation of a decklist I've ever read! :lol:

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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 12:09 am 

Joined: 2010-Oct-10 12:03 pm
Age: Dragon
Location: Wellington, New Zealand
TheDoctor wrote:
Although I cannot say that this is the best decklist I've ever seen, it is bar none the best presentation of a decklist I've ever read! :lol:


This.


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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 1:13 am 

Joined: 2010-Dec-24 3:52 pm
Age: Drake
This was an extraordinary decklist... at least, as a piece of creative writing, and as a themed deck. I have to agree that Naked Singularity probably has to go, due to the rules of the format, but overall the cards all seem to fit into the theme quite nicely! If you actually get to play this deck, I would hope that you're playing in an extremely casual play group... I have the feeling that this would get ripped-apart in more "competitive" areas. :(

On a slightly unrelated note... Ban, if you happen to have any other pieces of fiction to read, send them my way... I like the way you write. :D


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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 2:13 am 
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Joined: 2008-Aug-15 9:31 pm
Age: Elder Dragon
Which Lovecraft story is that?


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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 3:11 am 

Joined: 2008-Nov-10 2:14 am
Age: Elder Dragon
plank wrote:
TheDoctor wrote:
Although I cannot say that this is the best decklist I've ever seen, it is bar none the best presentation of a decklist I've ever read! :lol:


This.


Ditto, outside of the Naked Singularity violation. Though for flavour, I'd personally house-rule allow it in this deck.

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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 11:08 am 
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Joined: 2009-Aug-20 7:49 pm
Age: Elder Dragon
Location: New Hampshire
TheDoctor wrote:
Although I cannot say that this is the best decklist I've ever seen, it is bar none the best presentation of a decklist I've ever read! :lol:

I third or sixth or whatever it is this.

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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 11:28 am 
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Joined: 2007-Jan-05 12:58 am
Age: Elder Dragon
Thanks so much everybody. :oops:

trevor wrote:
Which Lovecraft story is that?

Aw shucks. :)

Izzet or Izzn't wrote:
On a slightly unrelated note... Ban, if you happen to have any other pieces of fiction to read, send them my way... I like the way you write. :D

I think that the only other (fictional) thing that I've posted online was a fan fiction story that I wrote for a MUD I used to play, years and years ago. It's not really very good. PMed you a link anyhow.


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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 11:43 am 
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Joined: 2007-Jan-05 12:58 am
Age: Elder Dragon
Izzet or Izzn't wrote:
I have to agree that Naked Singularity probably has to go, due to the rules of the format, but overall the cards all seem to fit into the theme quite nicely! If you actually get to play this deck, I would hope that you're playing in an extremely casual play group... I have the feeling that this would get ripped-apart in more "competitive" areas. :(

For some reason, the Naked Singularity thing didn't even cross my mind when I was building the deck. I guess I was too focused on flavour. Crappy.

As for the competitive thing, I really don't mind. I've got lots of good decks that are top tier in my playgroup, and power wasn't even a consideration when making this list. A genuinely shit deck has actually been something I've been wanting to build for a while, since I regularly play with newer players at my LGS. I can tweak this one all I want, and only the flavour will become more powerful.

Speaking of that, there is one aspect of the deck that I'm still not sure of. I definitely want the general to be the cult leader, rather than Cthulhu being the general or whatever, but for that there are two main options:

1) Nebuchadnezzar is an actual biblical figure whose history is pretty Lovecraftian itself (dreams of enormous beings, builds large gold idol for worship, goes insane and is exiled for seven years, spends the end of his life prophesying the end of days)

2) Dralnu, Lich Lord represents the legends of immortal cult leaders from the mountains of China really well. Also, this is the thing I really like about him, I get to play Dralnu's Pet for the flavour combo.

Thoughts? Any other ideas or advice is welcome also.


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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-13 6:08 pm 
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Joined: 2009-Oct-18 8:52 pm
Age: Elder Dragon
Location: Oz
It's too bad (for the SOLE purpose of this deck) Emmy got banned; it's complete on theme for an HPL deck.

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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-14 12:45 pm 

Joined: 2010-Sep-28 8:44 am
Age: Elder Dragon
Location: Hamilton, ON
Daf wrote:
It's too bad (for the SOLE purpose of this deck) Emmy got banned; it's complete on theme for an HPL deck.


Any play group that refused to grant the exception after reading this write-up needs to be eaten by cosmic horrors anyway...

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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-15 3:04 am 

Joined: 2009-Dec-22 5:02 am
Age: Drake
you are referring to a strange island at the end of the tale.
in goes Island Fish Jasconius!
also, i think Leviathan must be played due to awesome artwork.

out goes Naked Singularity and something else.

awesome deck.


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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-16 12:00 pm 
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Joined: 2007-Jan-05 12:58 am
Age: Elder Dragon
skallbrand wrote:
you are referring to a strange island at the end of the tale.
in goes Island Fish Jasconius!
also, i think Leviathan must be played due to awesome artwork.

Those are actually really good ideas.


No one has any opinion on the general? Vote for your favourite: Nebuchadnezzar or Dralnu, Lich Lord!


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 Post subject: Re: Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
AgePosted: 2011-Jan-16 5:23 pm 
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Joined: 2008-Mar-24 12:14 am
Age: Elder Dragon
Location: Oakland, CA
Nebuchadnezzar.


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